OnTap Magazine

26 | Winter 2018 | ontapmag.co.za Send it to lucy@ontapmag.co.za and you might just see your name in print. If your story is chosen for publication, you’ll get a year’s subscription to On Tap on us! TERRENCE CARNEY THE HOMEBREW I wouldn't describe myself as a beer slut (though others have - unceremoniously to my face), but I enjoy beer. A lot. Craft beer especially. I love the fact that craft beer is artisanal and that brewers experiment with flavours. I appreciate the daring, the creativity, the curiosity and the craftsmanship of it all. And though I'm not that great with my hands (lost lovers complain), it was always something I wanted to try for myself someday. And so at last it happened. For my 37th birthday, my boyfriend bought me a partial mash kit so I could brew my own beer. Finally – and an Irish stout to boot. I'd been meaning to try it out for so long, but never really got around to it. Now I had no excuse. But once I read the brewing instructions, I was much less confident. For weeks I complained and came up with all kinds of excuses not to attempt any beer making. It's tricky! And it calls for patience, something I have very little of. I expected it to be somewhat challenging, but jeepers; all those different temperatures and constant sanitising. What? Was I about to perform open-heart surgery? So I did what any self- respecting person would do: I manipulated my boyfriend into making the beer for me. It was, after all, my birthday present. When it came down to it though, I couldn’t resist pitching in and one Saturday morning, once the breakfast dishes were cleared, we got started. Like a sick baby, we had to take its temperature reading and wipe its mouth. I had this paternal fear that I didn’t sanitise well enough and that my baby would grow some gross fifth leg after four weeks. I wasn’t ready for a Frankenstein beer baby. My perception of the process changed, however, the moment the beautiful smell of cooked wort filled the house. I was amazed that I could already tell we were making stout. That is exactly what I loved about the DIY kit and why I've always wanted to try and make beer myself; suddenly I was aware of the processes and smells. For the first time I could see what happens when you add ingredients together. It was no longer just a flavoursome drink I enjoyed guzzling in the company of friends. It became something complex and organic. Something that deserved a little more respect from my side. And, if I’m completely honest and a bit less of a drama queen, the process was actually fairly quick and painless. Four weeks later, the reward for my uncharacteristic patience paid off. The result was a perfect black stout with a creamy head. And the taste? Superfantastisch! Made with love (and probably a bit of annoyance from the boyfriend's side). I gave a select few of my friends a sip from my glass, to great applause. Because that is what friends do. Not only do we share our joys with our mates, we also lure them in (some might use the word ‘ensnare’, but that really sounds harsh) and get them equally excited about making beer at home. Then you sit back and watch them make the beer for you. As an act of love, of course. Now for the important question: Another stout or something else? The beautiful smell of cooked wort filled the house GOT A BEERY TALE TO SHARE? LOVE ACT OF AS AN WIN