OnTap Magazine

Send it to lucy@ontapmag.co.za and you might just see your name in print. If your story is chosen for publication, you’ll get a year’s subscription to On Tap on us! SHAE LEIGH B arney is a dinosaur that I fought in a toy store. I kicked his butt and lmed the ght, and won tickets to a... woah. You need the full story rst. Once upon a time, there was a purple dinosaur that stood innocently in a toy store. at said, if the Barney songs I sang as a kid are anything to go by he might not be all that innocent. Nevertheless, that's where he lived. Once upon a time there was also a not-purple human who lived close by. Maybe also not so innocent but there were no songs about that (fortunately). is human liked to win things. e lottery was never appealing but festival tickets, or goodies or food... now that was the good stu . It began with an online dare – and a promise of tickets to a craft beer festival. e human uttered online the immortal words “I would do anything to get tickets to that festival”, and so the gauntlet was laid and the adventure began. e human kitted up with the least conspicuous out t, grabbed the trusty cellphone and headed for the store. Luckily, on a sweltering hot day, the chariot (second-hand student vehicle) didn’t have to go far. e doors of the store were wide open and welcoming but… something was wrong. e human armed with excuses and awkward-moment jokes, entered the store and in the far corner stood a security guard. With all the e ort focused on choosing an out t that didn’t attract attention, a rather key point was overlooked: this human didn’t have a child but was studiously browsing a children’s store. But it was too late to turn back. Human pride was at stake. A pride so vehement that said human would even scu e with a purple dinosaur to protect it (the pride, not the dinosaur, obviously). It’s interesting to note that toy stores don’t put the biggest stu ed animals in the front. e human rst encountered a st-sized purple dinosaur. at would do nothing for the ego or the video. Next came an out-of-shape dinosaur that would only be worth laughing at, and three sizes later the biggest that this lump of colour came in was knee high. Sigh. A quick glance around the store, a lightning bolt move to prop the cellphone up on a smaller purple dinosaur and the ght began. Slow at rst but then… POW! BASH! WAP! DING! ( e actual noises were closer to soft thumps and cotton wool in an ear.) e human reigned over the purple dinosaur, took a bow on camera and rushed out the toy store avoiding all eye contact with any members of the security detail. e video went online, got instant recognition and the two tickets were granted to none other than the Capital Craft Beer Festival. Let’s just say, the human has never looked back and now runs a beer blog on Instagram. at’s how the obsession began and there’s no sight of it slowing down. It began with an online dare – and a promise of tickets to a craft beer festival GOT A BEERY TALE TO SHARE? WIN THE DINOSAUR FIGHT THAT LAUNCHED A PASSION FOR CRAFT BEER 18 | Summer 2018 | ontapmag.co.za